How Does the Nervous System Function? Ways to Regulate
Have you ever felt anxious out of nowhere, snapped at someone you love, or completely shut down? These experiences can leave you wondering, “why did I react like that?” or “why can’t I just calm down?”. Understanding your nervous system can offer some clarity, and help you find the best ways to regulate your system.
You’ve probably heard the term nervous system regulation or come across videos on somatic work. Maybe your feed, like mine, is full of reels and posts promising to teach you how to “fix your anxiety in 30 seconds” or “hack your stress response instantly.” Some of those tools can be helpful, but others tend to oversimplify what’s actually a very personal and layered experience. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, confused, or like none of those tips quite landed for you — you’re not alone.
This blog is here to help you cut through the noise. Consider it a compassionate, beginner-friendly guide to understanding your stress response and finding practices that actually work for you. That means in moments of stress, conflict, grief, anxiety, anger, uncertainty, change — you’ll have ways to tune into what your body and mind need most.
Because regulation isn’t one-size-fits-all. For some, it’s breathwork or gentle movement; for others, it’s stepping outside, seeking connection, or simply recognizing what’s happening in their body without judgment. The more awareness you have of how your system responds, the more you can meet yourself with understanding and create a sense of safety within — no trendy video required.
What is the nervous system?
Your nervous system is like your body's personal security system and communication headquarters. Any information, sensations, and experiences happening in the world around you are taken in to be processed, then your nervous system guides you on the best way to respond based on what it perceives will keep you safe.
What are the 3 main functions of the nervous system?
While the nervous system is commonly talked about with mental health, it’s tasked with regulating your heartbeat, breath, and digestion too.
The main functions of your nervous system include:
Sense information from the world through sensory organs
Process that information in the brain and spinal cord
Send out responses via nerve impulses to move your muscles, adjust your heart rate, release hormones, or remember where you left your keys
It runs quietly in the background, always scanning for threats so you’re protected from anything that may feel like it jeopardizes your safety or comfort.
Sounds great, right? Well, yes it’s amazing to know your nervous system will kick you into high gear to run from a bear but sometimes that same intense response can come out when you’re afraid to let someone down or feeling overwhelmed at yet another task on your overflowing plate.
What influences how the nervous system works?
One of the reasons it’s so important to learn about your nervous system is because yours is unique and shaped by your life experiences. The way you were raised, who you spent time around, what you had to overcome, and how safe you felt taught your body how to respond to the world. Today, that all continues to inform how your nervous system chooses to respond in any given moment.
Sometimes when we’re feeling on edge, shut down, or reacting in a way that doesn’t feel great, it’s just our bodies using patterns it learned to protect us Bringing some compassion to the “why” behind it all can also help you intentionally shift your response, teaching your nervous system new ways to feel safe, calm, and connected.
Here’s a deeper dive into the factors that impact your nervous system:
How you were cared for as a child
Stress or tough experiences you’ve been through
How safe or connected you feel with people in your life
Cultural or family expectations (even the unspoken ones)
What and when you eat
How well you sleep
Whether you move your body or not
How you breathe and hold your body
How much screen time or noise you're around
The energy of people around you (yep—calm people can help calm you too)
How does the nervous system affect behavior?
Let’s talk about how your nervous system shows up in the way you move through daily life, especially when you’re someone who’s trying to hold it all together and used to pushing through. You don’t have to be experiencing stress to see your nervous system at work, but any moment of dysregulation can cause you to behave differently.
You might notice changes in how you connect with others, show up at work, handle conflict, and even rest (or struggle to). If you're someone who’s high-achieving, constantly “on,” and good at taking on a lot without letting it show, you might not even notice that your nervous system is stuck in overdrive.
But it shows up through burnout, feeling irritable, avoiding hard conversations, wanting to isolate, feeling that urge to scroll or numb out through technology, or being totally and utterly exhausted even after a full night’s sleep. We’ll talk more about how to notice your nervous system is dysregulated, but let’s first break down some more about why this shift occurs.
Your autonomic nervous system (aka the part that runs in the background) has two main settings:
Sympathetic (fight or flight)
The sympathetic part of the brain kicks in when your body senses stress or danger. You might feel anxious, restless, hyper-focused, or like you have to keep going even when you’re depleted.
It might look like:
Feeling wired but tired at the end of the day, and still checking emails at 10 PM: You’ve been going nonstop, but instead of winding down, your brain is still racing through your to-do list and “what ifs” and it may be hard to settle in, sleep, or turn your mind to something present.
Snapping at your partner or kids over something small: You're not actually mad about the dishes but your system is maxed out and interpreting minor stress as a major threat, so you find yourself snapping or saying things without thinking.
Saying “yes” to one more project even though you're already overwhelmed: You’re operating from a place of urgency and fear of letting someone down, and not because you actually have the bandwidth, putting your needs below others’.
Parasympathetic (rest and digest)
The parasympathetic function of your nervous system is your calming state that helps you slow down, breathe, and recharge when sensory signals are overrun. But when you’re in a high-stress lifestyle, this part often gets ignored or overridden.
It might look like:
Turning off devices after work and intentionally creating time to decompress: You notice when your mind is racing and choose to slow down with a walk, reading, or simply deep breathing before you return to the to do list.
Responding patiently when someone interrupts your busy day: Instead of snapping, you pause, take a breath, and connect with what’s really happening inside you before reacting and notice what you need to manage the situation at hand.
Setting clear boundaries around your workload and saying “no” to protect your energy: You recognize your limits and choose rest and restoration as part of your success toolkit, knowing it will help you show up stronger in every other area.
It’s so common to read the parasympathetic nervous system responses and think to yourself, “that sounds great but also impossible”. Let’s normalize that no one operates there 100% of the time, however you do have the capabilities and natural system in place to help you feel more at peace.
As you read through, you might see opportunities to simply move away from sympathetic for now even if it’s for a moment at a time. The more you practice, the more natural it will become to return yourself to a place of regulation when stress or threat arrive.
You can learn how to come down from that constant “on” switch and access more calm, clarity, and capacity in your life by understanding how your body works.
What is somatic healing and why start with the body?
The word somatic comes from the Greek word soma, which simply means “body”. It makes sense that somatic healing is all about connecting with your body through physical sensations, movements, and breath as another approach to process emotions, stress, and even trauma.
-> Read about the mind-body connection and intentional wellness
You may be familiar with juggling schedules, deadlines, and people needing you at work and at home. It can definitely cause your mind to stay in overdrive and when that happens it’s nearly impossible to access problem solving, analyzing your feelings or talking it out.
When our nervous system is dysregulated we’re just focused on making it through the day, at any costs. Somatic work normalizes that our brains sometimes just don’t have the answers or the words to handle what’s happening internally, which is where tending to your body might become a helpful tool.
Somatic healing is like a loving reminder that trauma and stress aren’t just “in your head.” They live in your body and can show up as:
Tension in your shoulders or other parts of the body
Loss of feeling and sensory receptors
Increased heart rate
Slower motor function
A knot in your stomach
A loss or increase in appetite
Restless energy you can’t quite shake
Feeling nauseous or faint
Not being able to sleep
Immune challenges (getting sick easily)
Clenching or grinding teeth
Headaches or stomach aches
Cold or hot extremities
Tight or restricted breathing
Skin reactions (rashes, hives, etc.)
These signals might be subtle as the function of the nervous system shifts under stress, but of course medical help is the best route if symptoms come out of nowhere or persist.
Starting with the body to manage stress
Focusing on the body first when things feel off gives you permission to feel what’s happening beneath the surface without needing the words just yet. This isn’t about mastering a complicated technique or taking a 30 minute yoga class, but instead seeing what it would feel like to tune in, slow down, and notice what your body may be trying to tell you.
For example, instead of blowing off four nights of poor sleep as “just being busy”, you might wonder if your body is asking for deep rest that it’s been lacking. Or maybe a stomach ache that can easily be pushed aside as eating something funny turns into a call for you to pay attention and do something nourishing for yourself.
Just noticing is enough to start to send that signal that you’re paying attention to your body’s cues and can work towards regulation in a way that resonates with your current situation.
Learning how to support your body’s natural response to threat
The human body responds to stress or perceived threat in a few common ways. As you read through, see what resonates with you knowing you don’t have to fit into a single box and it's common to experience a mix of responses depending on the situation. When you know your stress response, you can tailor grounding techniques that pair well.
Fight response
What it looks like
Your body is getting ready to stand your ground or push back against the threat, which you might notice as irritability, frustration, or getting aggressive. In your body it can feel like a racing heart, tightened jaw, or sudden energy burst that urges you to take action or confront something.
Grounding may look like
Physical release: Squeezing a pillow, squeezing a stress ball, or doing a quick burst of exercise like jumping jacks to safely discharge energy.
Voice your feelings: Saying out loud what you’re feeling (“I’m really frustrated right now”) to help move the energy from inside out.
Ground with your feet: Feel your feet firmly on the floor, shifting your weight side to side, reconnecting with your physical presence rather than the racing thoughts.
Flight response
What it looks like
You have a strong urge to escape or avoid whatever is causing stress, which you may notice as being restless or anxious. In the body you can experience physical discomfort as thoughts race, and may try to move away or zone out to distract yourself and feel safe.
Grounding may look like
Slow, deep breathing: Try a breath pattern (inhale 4 seconds, hold 4 seconds, exhale 6 seconds) to calm the nervous system and slow the urge to run.
Engage your senses: Name 5 things you see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you hear, 2 things you smell, and 1 thing you taste to bring your awareness back to the present moment.
Gentle movement: Walk slowly or stretch gently to invite calm and remind the body it’s safe.
Freeze response
You might feel stuck, numb, or like you can’t move or make a decision. Sometimes it feels like your mind goes blank, or you dissociate, kind of like you’re watching life happen without fully participating. It can be harder to notice what’s happening in your body altogether because you’re disconnecting from it in order to handle the threatening situation.
Grounding may look like
Small, intentional movements: Wiggle your fingers or toes, or gently tap your body to remind yourself you’re here and out of real danger.
Connect to your breath: Focus on feeling the rise and fall of your belly with each breath by placing your hand on your heart and stomach, noticing the rhythm that’s naturally occurring.
Use warmth: Hold a warm cup or place your hands under warm water to stimulate sensation and bring gentle life back into your body.
Fawn response
You try to please people, appease others, or avoid conflict to feel safe and navigate the stressor even if it's not what you really want to do. You might find yourself saying “yes” when you want to say “no,” or forgetting your needs altogether to “get through” the moment of stress. Making sure other people are comfortable may be a way your nervous system is trying to feel safety.
Grounding may look like
Check in with your body: Pause and notice physical sensations when you’re about to say “yes.” Is your chest tight or shoulders tense? This can help you remember your needs.
Practice saying no in low-stakes moments: Try to set small boundaries to build confidence and trust in your voice so it’s easier to access when perceived threat is high.
Self-compassion reminders: Speak kindly to yourself (“It’s okay to take up space and say what I need”) to gently shift the impulse to people-please.
-> Here are a few ideas to practice self kindness and compassion
How do I regulate my nervous system?
Our goal isn’t to feel calm all the time, because honestly that’s just not realistic. Instead, we’re looking for ways to help your body return to a sense of safety, presence, and connection when these moments arise. Don’t worry– we know not everyone has all the time in the world to practice regulating, so we broke down examples that align to your lifestyle, time, and energy.
Somatic tools in under 30 seconds
Exhale longer than you inhale: Try 4 counts in, 6 counts out to signal safety to your body.
Sigh out loud: A long audible exhale can release tension fast.
Focus on touch: Run your hands under cold water or grab something textured to snap back to the present.
Butterfly hug: Cross your arms and tap your shoulders gently, alternating sides.
Somatic tools you can do at work
Ground your feet: Feel both feet pressing into the floor during a meeting or call, paying enough attention to notice what it feels like to be supported by your own body.
Chair twists: Gently rotate your upper body side to side to release tension.
Breath and posture reset: Sit tall, drop your shoulders, take a slow breath.
Name the sensation: Share what you feel, such as “My chest feels tight,” or “I feel heat in my face.”
Somatic tools to practice alone
Shake it out: Shake your hands, arms, legs and feel the release.
Body scan: Slowly bring attention from head to toe, pausing to breathe into tense spots.
Hold something comforting: Grab a blanket, soft shirt, or even a pet that feels like home to simply hold.
Movement: A stretch, walking, or even moving to a different space can help you release and attune to your body more than you might by staying still in a moment of discomfort.
Somatic tools to do with others
Eye contact with someone safe: Co-regulation happens in connection. Even a few seconds of tuning in closely to someone you’re talking to can be grounding.
Synchronize breathing: Breathe together with a partner, friend, coach, or therapist.
Name and share how you're feeling: Speaking it aloud in a safe space can help release what’s held inside.
Gentle touch: A hug, hand hold, or shoulder squeeze can regulate both people. You can also do this with your fur baby!
-> Feel supported with the safe space to practice grounding in a coaching session
More ways to nurture your nervous system
So, we talked about what you can do to calm your nervous system, but here are a few more ways you can support a healthy overall system to be even more proactive. These are things you can do especially when life feels hectic, to reinforce feelings of comfort and connection to yourself and the world around you.
Get enough sleep: Quality rest gives your nervous system the chance to reset and recover.
Move your body daily: Whether it’s a walk, yoga, or gentle stretching, movement helps release tension and balance your energy.
Practice breathwork and grounding: Deep, mindful breathing even when you’re not under stress, and tuning into your senses can soothe your nervous system on the spot.
Connect safely with others: Positive social interactions remind your brain that you’re supported and safe.
Spend time in nature: Fresh air and natural surroundings help calm your nervous system and refresh your mind.
Limit overstimulation: Give yourself breaks from screens, social media, loud noises, or busy environments when you can, taking note of when you start to feel on edge or uncomfortable and building in soothing boundaries around that.
You don’t have to do them all every day. Even one small practice can make a meaningful difference. The key is to listen to your body and give it what it needs to feel safe and cared for.
-> Gain support to tailor self care and body nourishment with mind body coaching
FAQ: Nervous system regulation and somatic healing
Why is the nervous system important?
Think of your nervous system like the control center for your whole body, constantly sending messages back and forth between your brain and the rest of you. It helps you respond to everything happening around you, whether that’s feeling excited, calm, or stressed out.
When it’s working well, you feel balanced and grounded. When it’s out of sync, you might notice anxiety, overwhelm, or even physical tension. So, taking care of your nervous system is really about taking care of your whole self.
What are the nervous system parts?
The nervous system has two main parts that work together:
Central nervous system: Your brain and spinal cord as the command center
Peripheral nervous system: All the nerves that spread out from your spine to the rest of your body, like little messengers delivering sensory information
Within this, you’ve got the sympathetic nervous system (that’s your “fight or flight” responder) and the parasympathetic nervous system (the “rest and digest” helper). It’s this dynamic balance between the two that keeps you feeling steady.
How does the nervous system work?
The human brain is always listening and responding. When you face a challenge, your sympathetic system might kick in, getting your heart pumping and senses sharper to help you act quickly. Then, when things settle down, your parasympathetic system helps slow everything back down so you can rest and recover.
If you're into the technical stuff:
Your nervous system is the body’s communication and control network that helps you sense the world around you, make decisions, and control your body’s functions. It’s made up of nervous tissue, nerve cells (neurons), and support cells called glia. This system runs throughout the length of the body and connects every part of you.
At the center is your brain, which acts like command central. It’s protected by your skull and divided into different parts:
The cerebral cortex is the outer layer of the brain where higher-level thinking, emotions, memory, and conscious awareness happen.
Beneath that is white matter (which carries messages) and gray matter (where information is processed).
The brain stem controls essential life functions like breathing, heartbeat, and digestion — things you don’t consciously think about.
Your brain connects to the spinal cord, a long bundle of nervous tissue that runs through your vertebral column (spine). From the spinal cord, spinal nerves branch out to the entire body, carrying signals to and from your sensory organs (like eyes, ears, and skin) and muscles.
Nerve cells send messages using tiny electrical signals called nerve impulses. These impulses travel rapidly through your nervous system to control movements, sense pain or temperature, and respond to the environment.
The nervous system is supported by blood vessels that deliver oxygen and nutrients to the brain and nerves, keeping everything functioning properly.
During early development, a flat layer of cells called the neural plate forms. This folds to create the neural tube, which eventually becomes the brain and spinal cord — the core of your nervous system.
How does the nervous system work with other systems?
Your nervous system is like the master communicator that connects deeply with your hormonal system, immune system, digestive system, and more. For example, when you’re stressed, your neural activity signals your body to release stress hormones, which can affect digestion, sleep, and mood.
That’s why healing your nervous system can have a ripple effect, helping your whole body feel better and more balanced.
How can I tell if something is wrong with my nervous system?
While nothing is wrong with you if you’re feeling off, your nervous system may be out of balance at times or working on overdrive (it happens!). Signs can show up as feeling constantly on edge, anxious, easily startled, or disconnected from your body.
What's happening in your outside world impacts the rest of the body and how you process in your somatic nervous system.
You can notice your motor neurons and sensory neurons are off as trouble sleeping, muscle tension, loss of memory, or even digestive issues. Sometimes, emotional overwhelm or feeling shut down and numb are clues your nervous system is struggling to regulate.
If you notice these patterns regularly, it’s worth exploring ways to support your nervous system health.
